Saturday, March 22, 2014

Max Money - "The Official Voice Of Google" - Just Kidding, Okay? Max Money Is Nothing More Than "His Google's Voice"

       Saturday, 22 March 2014 -CHICKALOON, ALASKA - All right you folks who have hung in there all this time remembering that every time you try to publish a blog and get approved for Adsense you are officially out there looking for a job (please check your local law on that as I cannot and do not purport to give legal advice which can only be given by a duly licensed practitioner of law).  But those of you who have been patient can see we are about to jump ahead of the pack and leave their tired rankings and that gobbledygook behind.
      IT'S TIME FOR US TO LAUNCH SHOCKBLOG! (Now they will try to steal that name from me, too, as if there were no copyright law, Berne convention or other intellectual property laws before "Grab My Domain!" So maybe some of us might finally send in some suggestion comments (or money) to the blog. The few devoted readers we have can contribute, discuss, strategize, monetize and come screaming onto the blog scene that we will not lead it, WE WILL STOMP IT!  Right on.

Copyright 2014 Martin P. All World Rights Expressly Reserved

Monday, October 21, 2013

Is It Safe To Come Out? Do We Have A Government Again? Okay, Let Us Blog

       21 October 2013, KEY WEST, FL - When I heard the Government was going to shut down to make sure I had not health care that was one thing I could understand. This is America after all not Canada. But what really got me was is that not kind of dangerous to let all the other countries in the world know. I realized we have become a lot more popular since 9/11/2011 just like all President Bush's friends hoped we would not, but still I think there are some countries that do not like us. Anyway even if we were going to shut the country down should we not have kept it a secret or PRETENDED on the news that even though trapguns are illegal for most of us regular folks that the U.S. would leave some of those around with missiles so no one would really want to come straying our way.
      Anyway I am ashamed to say I wrote a post for another blog but really was on my way to Key West. I figured if they came to get us I could escape to Cuba on a fishing boat or tire or something and at least become a Two National (Tool? National) nope I got it now a dual national. In other words I was going to go and live under Commie rule just as I was too chicken to get blown away by one of them do not like us. I can not get a fully automatic AK-47 although they seem to have no problem at all. I guess we got to make money somewhere.
      Well I called my Mom to admit I was going to become a Cuban-American. She said Maxwell you are the biggest idiot in the world (even though my real true name is Max Money). Why you going to go and do something fool like that? Did you not hear we got our Government back a couple days ago?"
       "Mom, that is super-good news. You know I have been writing and traveling a lot. Trying to keep people up on the world of blogging with all the latest, most accurate news and techniques. Anyhow is this new Government as good as the old one? Whose the President?"
       "Maxwell you really are a hopeless idiot."
        "It is 'Money Max', and a lot of people happen to think I am an idiot with hope."
         "You really are a dope, son." Then the line went dead after that like it did on a lot of our calls. Anyway nobody is here to read my biography but for the blogging years. Anyway in the interest of full disclosure I am putting my pageview count in the page right here so everybody can see it. Normally I would not do that as it can be very embarrassing but if it is at least it will inspire some of you!

Copyright 2013 maxmoney All World Rights Expressly Reserved

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Where Did That Week Go? Did That Happen To You Too Bloggers To Get Rich?

       Sunday, 22 September 2013, RENO - Okay I did not mean for that to happen but the next thing I know a week has gone by without a new post. Now my mother has cried and said, "Maxwell (not my name. my name is Max Money) why do you not go out and make an honest living". So naturally I reviewed my many skills and gave a good deal of thought to what was making my mother unhappy. I concluded it was my sister. Anyway I cut my skills down to the "short list" so it did not take too long. There was blackjack but that was not too reliable.
       And here I find myself back at blog central station where I gave my word that we would blog to get rich. I have to stop watching all that Adsense stuff. It makes me feel like a loser. What is the matter with me? Are my ads upside down? Is someone else getting paid for them because I put down the wrong number somewhere? Do everybody else's ads start like this: "Max we can help you. Please just send us your credit card number for safekeeping. We have helped thousands of people just like you."
       Help me what? Maybe I could just get some of the big ads. I follow all the instructions for the super-big ads but mine come out all teenie-weenie in colors like white on white or pea green on black, excuse me. Okay but I did find out some neat things we can do. If you have more than one post you can put an ad between posts, did you know that? Did I already tell you that? Well maybe you will remember it. HA HA!
       Go to "Layout". Click on "Post". See how there are all kinds of things that you can choose there. I have no idea what they mean mostly. But there is one that says "Put ads between posts". If you have your layout set right, I think, and you go to "Earnings" that will take you to "Adsense". Look for something that says "Your ads" or something like that. Drop it down. Pick the one that says put ads on your sidebar and between posts. And then you maybe you will be off and running. If you are not you can ask the "community". That is the two million other people who do blogs. One of them maybe will get back to you with a suggestion. Like turn on your computer.
       Meanwhile I do not get it with those "Search" boxes. They say I can have three, but they only let me have one. It is even worse with those "linkages" that they say do not count either. Like the "search" boxes however we are supposed to get money if someone searches and then clicks on something well here if they click on a word or phrase and that leads to something else, which they click on, we get money. And getting rich as my Uncle Money used to say is all about getting money. That is why he took all my Aunt Money's for "investments" before he was arrested for being married to three other women.    
       You would be surprised however that "marital privilege" does not work so well if you do that if you marry too many people at once. In fact it does not work at all. I saw a show on Oprah's "boy wonder" Dr. Phil one day last summer when my TV was working for about a couple hours after it was fixed by the same people who fixed my computer so it worked for a couple hours too. Anyway on that show they had on a divorced couple where the guy's "estranged" former wife called and said she wanted to talk to him for having an affair. So he went right over even though she and her boyfriend had tried to kill him a couple times already. He told his friend to call the police if he was not out of there by a certain time later in the morning.
       Did anyone see that Dr. Phil? Anyway, after the commercial we learned that after he went over they had a pretty good talk for a while. She still loved her former husband that she had tried to kill although she was confused. After a while he asked, "So you are not seeing him anymore?" She was honest, I will give her that. She pulled out a cocked loaded .357 Magnum pointed at him from a couple inches straight into his face. She said, "No. I am. I need to call him and ask him what to do." So she did.
       Meanwhile the guy's friend called him on his cell phone and told him he was worried. Should he call the police? How was it going? He told his friend he was not sure. That he should call back probably pretty soon.
       Now at the same time on her phone the boyfriend apparently said, "Empty the gun in his face." So she did. She hit her husband I think about four or five times in the head.
       Then, get this, she said, "Are you okay".
       Her husband said, "You hit me four times in the face, once in the ear, and the others missed. I think you hit that washer/dryer I got you."
       She told him she better call the police and did. Women are funny like that. "They want to know if you are okay? They want to send an ambulance if you need one."
       "I am not sure. I do not feel so well. You shot me a few times in the head."
       "They said we should wait. They want to talk to you." He agreed that they should come talk to them. While they waited the boyfriend called back. He was mad that she did not kill him. Then the police got there.
       He said he did not want to press charges. He agreed with Dr. Phil that their relationship had some problem. Dr Phil asked the guy if he would marry her again. He said he did not know. Dr. Phil observed that it was not a healthy relationship. Then it was time for the show to end. My TV broke again before Judge Judy's show. I am kind of afraid of her anyway. Like my Mom. Okay well I better go study some more Blogger.  Hang in there we should be rich any day now.